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People say life is the thing, but I prefer reading*

Another of my not-so-clever moments

I made macaroni cheese for dinner tonight. I make it with red onion, course grain mustard and bacon so I always have a few saucepans on the go. Tonight, my smartness got the better of me and I had a bit of an accident. I was sauteeing the onion, whilst frying the bacon and stirring the cheese sauce, and I had the macaroni in the big saucepan, ready to be cooked once the cheese sauce was ready.

All ok so far.

So there I was, stirring my cheese sauce, and it seemed to be taking a while to come to the boil. I turned the heat up a bit to hurry it along (I was hungry and the Antiques Roadshow was on*).

Stirring, stirring, stirring. Nothing doing. I turned the heat up again.

After a couple of minutes, I started to smell something burning. I thought it was the onion. No, the onion's fine. I thought it might be the bacon. Nope, bacon's fine. It wasn't until smoke started pouring out of the big saucepan holding the dry macaroni, that I realised why my cheese sauce wasn't coming to the boil.

Yes, I came (too late) to the same conclusion that you probably came to 4 lines ago - I had the wrong gas burner on. I had the dry macaroni over the biggest gas burner, which was on a high heat. For about 10 minutes. The kitchen filled with smoke, and when I put some water into the saucepan to prevent it from catching fire, the water boiled. Straightaway.

The macaroni is black and there is a layer of it welded to the bottom of my most-used medium sized saucepan... It's currently soaking in boiling water, but I'm not holding out much hope - did you know burnt-on macaroni is like effing concrete?! Well, you do now. I tell you, it's lucky I'm here to find these things out for you - thanks to me regular readers now know that human hair can withstand a chemical bath in hair dye developing fluid, and that burnt-on macaroni can stop bullets.

And, my friends, that knowledge is priceless.

*I know, I shouldn't admit to that but I don't care - I LOVE the Antiques Roadshow!


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At 15.1.07, Blogger Lynda said...

I've done that sort of thing. I have also set fire to numerous tea towels by letting them trail in the gas flame and not even noticing! If your saucepan is even remotely save-able, this should work (it worked when I created a whole new substance out of unattended glazed carrots and laziness!). Get a dishwasher tablet, put it in the pan, add hot water and bring to the boil. Let it boil for a few minutes stiring gingerly with a wooden spoon. I reckon if that doesn't shift it, your pan is, regrettably, deid.    

At 15.1.07, Blogger Drama Queen said...

Stupid is as stupid does!

I am sporting a big bandage after slicing my pinkie with the lid of a metal tin. I am allergic to plasters and it bleed for 4 hours last night so bandage it is. . .

I look stopid.    

At 15.1.07, Blogger Teeny said...

Lynda - thanks, will try that when I get home. I got the macaroni off, it's just the blackened lumps of charcoal that are posing the problem...!

DQ - you're a donut! At least it's your pinkie and therefore not essential for typing or anything...    

At 15.1.07, Blogger Cat said...

I make macaroni cheese in the microwave. It comes from Sainsburys just ready to pop in and all I need to do is grate some cheddar over the top... Nigella I ain't.    

At 15.1.07, Anonymous Anonymous said...

If your pot is of the stainless steel variety then it should withstand a wire scourer. the round ones are the best, if however it's non stick then sorry to the pan graveyard it must go.    

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*Logan Pearsall Smith

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