NotJustAHatStand

Yes, I know it's been months since I posted anything. And I know memes are the lazy blogger's answer to the need to post something (anything). But there was an open invitation at Sarah's, so start as you mean to go on I say:

1. The rules of the game get posted on the beginning.
2. Each player answers the rules about him or herself.
3. At the end of the post, the player tags five people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know that they’ve been tagged and asking them to read his [or her] blog.

What I was doing ten years ago:

Probably sitting final school exams, in preparation for The Big Bad World After High School.

Five things on my To-Do list today:

1. Arranging travel insurance (I leave for Rome on Saturday).
2. Arranging for my various fuzzy bits to be waxed in preparation for my holidays.
3. Feeding my cat, who is watching me type whilst miaowing plaintively.
4. Becoming fluent in Italian.
5. Buying a new umbrella because my old one finally gave up the ghost (RIP, previously indestructible umbrella).

Things I would do if I were a billionaire:

I'd buy a nice house in the country (complete with gardener), have lots of pets, my own library and I'd give some money to charity.

Three of my bad habits:

1. Not opening my mail. Bills are boring.
2. Staying up far too late reading, then sleeping in and being late for work.
3. I don't have any others - I'm practically perfect in every way.

Five places I’ve lived:

1. A small village on the outskirts of Edinburgh
2. My first house after leaving the Parentals, with my best friend.
3. My second house after leaving the Parentals, 5 doors away from #2.
4. First flat with Hubby (previously known as the Boy). Where we got engaged.
5. Current house, that I love to bits.
(I know my answers to this are supposed to be things like 'London', 'Milan' and 'Kuala Lumpur', but I have lived a very un-exotic life)

Five jobs I’ve had:

1. General dogsbody in the food court of a shopping centre.
2. Call centre drone.
3. Temp in a mind-numbingly boring office
4. Boring Office Job #1 - adminny person
5. Boring Office Job #2 (current) - computery type person in a large HE institution

Five books I’ve recently read:

1. Wuthering Heights, Emily Bronte (currently reading)
2. Animal Farm, George Orwell
3. March, Geraldine Brooks
4. Freedom in Exile: Autobiography of His Holiness the Dalai Lama of Tibet, The Dalai Lama
5. The Pillars Of The Earth, Ken Follett

Five people or communities I’m going to tag:

No-one, because it's so long since I updated, I don't think I have any readers left.
(Except possibly Farty because he left a comment the other week asking where I was)
(I'm here! Updating!)

Labels: memes, Travel, Writer's Block

I'm sure I should be doing something other than posting to my blog right now but all that's left on my to do list are things like 'clean bathroom' and 'wash dishes' and I've just had a spray tan so I can't get my hands wet in order to do any of those things (which I am GUTTED about). This means that the Boy will have to do them, especially because he has invited people round to the pigsty that is our flat tonight (but don't even get me started on that).

Roo's results came back from the vet on Saturday, and I am delighted to say that the lump on her leg was not cancer after all, but a mass of fatty tissue (niiice).

So. Everything is arranged, and all there is to worry about now are natural disasters, last minute changes-of-heart, or sudden and drastic weight-gain. I had a dream the other night that I weighed myself and the scales told me I was 17 stone. I had to go and try on my dress immediately to make sure it still fitted (it did).

I'm amazingly calm - I thought I'd be a gibbering mess by now. The ratio of nerves:excitement is leaning towards the latter. I'm super excited to put my dress on and see the Boy's face when I walk down the aisle. I'm looking forward to wearing my wedding ring, and going on honeymoon. I can't wait to finally, after seven and bit years, stand up, make my vows and hear the Boy make his. Because that means I can get fat and he can't escape.

I still can't believe that neither of our dads will be there to see us get married, but I'm sure they will both be looking down on us. And spluttering in horror at the wanton money-spending that has been going on in their absence.

As much as I'm looking forward to the wedding, I'm not going to miss the constant phone calls from people asking me what's happening about the cake/piper/catering/favours/flowers/minister. I'm not normally the most organised person and it's been a bit of a struggle being the person who co-ordinates everyone and everything. But I've managed it and so far there's not been any major disasters (there's still time though).

The thing I am most nervous about is the fact that, against my better judgement, I didn't get my passport renewed. I will have eight months left on my passport at the time we're returning from honeymoon - I know the rule is you have to have six months left on it at the time you're coming home, but I wish I'd got a new one, just in case. Two months doesn't seem like a very big margin of error. What if I counted wrong? What if the rules change on the day we fly out?

Ah well, it's too late now. My next post may be from a Malaysian detention centre.


See you after the jump.

Labels: Cats, dreams, Travel, Wedding

...When you can have randomness and lots of links?

It's been a while since I updated. I've had a busy old week and ordinarily I would have made myself sit down and post something. This may not be the best approach, given that when I do so, I end up writing something like this. Or this. And office-trumping, testicle-chomping posts are of no interest to man nor beast, are they now?

Anyway, this time I do have some news items to announce.

#clears throat#

We booked our honeymoon on Thursday. And I have refrained from posting about it, for THREE FULL DAYS. I will not become one of those brides that talk of nothing but their wedding and expects other people to find it as fascinating as they do.* However, the honeymoon is acceptable blogging fodder, as it's really just a fancypants holiday, and why spend all that money on it if you can't make people pig-sick hearing about it?

We're going to Malaysia (as I was hoping we would), or rather to an island off the coast of Malaysia, in the Langkawi Archipelago. The hotel we're staying in has a Reading Room stuffed full of books, where they serve high tea in the afternoons, including home-baked scones and jam. And there's a big empty beach on the doorstep where friendly little waiters bring cool drinks and palm leaves to fan you with**. Could it be any more perfect for me? I suspect Fiance may have to drag me out of there by my feet when it's time for us to leave. There's a big ol' patch of jungle to explore, and ancient limestone caves housing colonies of bats.*** There's also a lake that supposedly helps barren women to conceive. Given my near-pathological fear of childbirth, I'll be steering well clear of that one.

So it's all booked and sounding wonderful. We just have to pay for it now.

In other news, I went to see Casino Royale last night. I wasn't expecting to like Daniel Craig as Bond but I was surprised. He did a fair bit of pouting, which irritated me a little, but then (warning male readers: gratuitous torso-shot) he took his top off and all was well. Yes he's fair haired, and Bond was dark in the books, but hair colour isn't exactly central to the character is it? And anyway, a change is as good as a rest - Danny Boy gets the thumbs up from me. Judi Dench was typically good as M, the Bond girls were glamorous, and the bad guy was suitably creepy. The plot ticked along nicely, although I reckon they could have lost 15 minutes off the end. My rear was getting a bit numb by the end.

On the way home we had our own Bond moment when my mum was surprised by a large speed bump in the road, which she went over at approx 40mph. We nearly took off. In her defence, it wasn't marked with the white arrows you normally get and there were no signposts. However she was so surprised that she went over the next one at nearly the same speed (thankfully the road was deserted).

*Please tell me if I begin to display ANY symptoms of morphing into Bridezilla. Please. For my own good.

**Maybe I'm expecting a bit much with the palm leaves?

***I love those little guys! Although the Boy keeps reminding me they're probably the kind that attach themselves to your face with a vice-like grip in order to suck your blood, and not the cute little critters we get here in Blighty.

Labels: Film, Travel

I occasionally do something of such monumental stupidity I stagger even myself, but this one takes the biscuit. And as I've had something of a theme going on recently, I thought I'd continue it with this post, taken from my archive of back-up posts...

When I was 19 my best friend and her sister were going to stay with family in Boston for a couple of weeks, and they invited me to go with them. All my family holidays had been in the UK and I'd had one girly holiday in Majorca, so I was rather excited - America seemed much more glamorous. As it would only be my second trip abroad I was quite glad we would be staying with grown ups who would make sure I didn't get on the wrong flight home and end up in Estonia instead of Edinburgh.

The friend's uncle and aunt lived about an hour outside of Boston, so they suggested we stay in a hotel in the city for a night, to let us do some shopping (and give them a bit of peace and quiet probably).

We took them at their word and shopped. A lot. We had exhausted the shops in the Harvard Square area, so we went off to a shopping mall a bit further afield. Once we were done we hailed a yellow cab to take us back to Harvard Square. Now for some stupid reason I had my passport with me in a little backpack, along with most of the money I had left. I also had lots of shopping bags. You can probably guess what's coming. When we pulled up outside the hotel I gaily hopped out of the taxi, making sure I had my precious shopping bags (new jeans! precious!), and the taxi drove off. It was at this moment that I realised my backpack containing my passport and money was disappearing round the corner in the back of a yellow cab.

I mouthed something incoherent whilst pointing and looking horrified, which alerted my friends to the fact that something was terribly wrong. I then found my voice and shrieked 'MY BAG!'

The minutes after this went shooting by like a film that has been speeded up - we saw the taxi turn right and because we knew we were in the middle of Harvard Square, figured there was a decent chance of flagging the driver down on the other side if we ran in the opposite direction. So we tore off at full tilt down this busy street, until we came out onto the street where we expected our taxi to emerge.

We came out onto the street, which was a sea of yellow cabs, stretching as far as the eye could see.

Of course they were all identical, all possible contenders for the one we'd just been in - it was like a scene from a movie. When I saw this I was sure all was lost, and that I was going to have to ask my friend's uncle, who was already being very kind by putting me up, to take me to the Embassy to get another passport. I had no idea where the Embassy was, or how much I would have to pay for another passport. Or even if they would GIVE me another passport, as I clearly should not have been in a foreign country without being accompanied by a sensible adult.

Thankfully the driver of our cab had indeed pulled out onto the street we were on, recognised us (I don't know how because by that time we were shiny-faced, wild haired and ever so slightly freaking out) and pulled over - for which I will be eternally grateful. He opened his window and drawled 'all right girls?' but before he'd finished the sentence I'd already dived into the back of the cab and retrieved my precious bag. I may have kissed him, I don't remember as I think I was in a mild state of shock at how stupid I was.

Thankfully, this ranks highly in my moments of stupidity, and I've never actually boarded the wrong plane, or asked a suspect-looking gentleman with a fake beard to take a picture of me with my lovely new camera.

But I'm still young(ish). I have plenty time for new and ridiculous adventures.

Labels: Travel

Fiance and I went to visit friends of ours today, who have a 1 and a half year old boy. The wee boy is lovely, and our friends have a ball being parents - they've both taken to it like the proverbial ducks to water. We always have fun playing too (the baby got Weebles for Christmas! Remember Weebles?! They wobble but they don't fall down!), and when we leave their house I always say to Fiance 'aww, isn't Baby cute, should we have one?'.

In the days when we had only been going out for 5 years, weren't even engaged yet, and our friends were tearing their hair out because Baby wouldn't sleep through the night, Fiance used to look really freaked out by this and say 'Umm, err... ooh look - a bird'. Now however, he actually considers the question and then he says, yes, at some point he would like to have a baby. At which point I say 'Whoa, hold on there Mister, I was JOKING!'

This happens every time we go there. I know what Fiance's answer will be, I know that I am pretty much in the same place as him (i.e. I'd like one, but I'm not ready for it yet), but it's kind of a ritual now. The damn baby's just too cute - he has this effect on me.

Anyway, today the in-car discussion actually got to the stage where we were considering whether my maternity pay plus his wage would be enough to cover our outgoings, before I said 'Whoa, hold on there Mister, I was joking!'. This is progress for me.

But then I realised that having babies straight after we get married will render my dream of taking a career break and spending a few months travelling completely impossible. I'm coming to the conclusion that although I do want to have children (and I've always thought 30ish is a good age at which to procreate), I also have other ambitions that I'm not quite ready to give up yet. I know they always say that you can get out and enjoy the world when your children have flown the nest, but erm, I don't want to wait that long. What if I get landed with wastrel kids who don't leave home till they're 45? Or what if I get hit by a bus on my 60th birthday, the day before I'm due to leave on my round the world trip and I never get to see Uluru, Victoria Falls or the Great Barrier Reef? WHAT THEN? I will have died a poorly travelled person (albeit one who has left a genetic legacy on the planet for when the mothership returns) who has never fulfilled her wish to see the Grand Canyon before she dies.

So I've worked out that I have three-and-a-bit years (I'm 27 in May) in which to:

a) Get married. I can pretty much tick this one off already but you never know what's gonna happen. Fiance might find out about my criminal record.

b) Save up, take a career break, and travel the world for a few months.

c) Get home without being eaten by a lion or falling into the Zambezi, and get up the duff.

Should be easy enough, I reckon.

Labels: Babies, Fiance, Travel